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Episode 44. Child Social Services Worker Alex Baxter.

Child social service workers are often disliked by divorced parents and organisations, especially when court proceedings are involved. But it’s a very difficult and high stress job. Making decisions that affect people’s lives, where no matter what you do someone is bound to hate you for it. So how do they make their decisions? What sort of evidence do they need? And are they aware of Parental Alienation syndrome, or even trained to deal with PAS? This week I address some of these questions with child social services worker Alex Baxter. Some may see this as speaking to someone ‘on the other side’, but Alex share’s some important insight into her profession, why she does it, and even some advice for parents going through the court system. And I think I ask her questions that many parents would like to know the answers to.

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24 Replies to “Episode 44. Child Social Services Worker Alex Baxter.”

  1. Thanks Alex. Thanks Paul. This helps me understand what you have to do Alex. The alienated parent is often full of anger, being denied their rights to spend time with their child, especially if false claims have been made and are the reason a parent is denied custody. A custodial parent as you say does not get reprimanded if he/she denies access to the other parent, going against court orders (that happened to my son who had trouble every time he went to pick up his little son). And yet, if the alienated parent ‘runs off’ with the child, he/she is soon brought to task and is looked upon as a criminal. I’ve also been the paternal grandparent who has been denied access to grandchildren because of the mother, yet the maternal grandparents continue to have a relationship with the children. So much needs to change. I’m so glad that you do look for signs of the child being groomed to turn against one parent, but sad that there is no training in this area. Keep up the good work. I can see why you do what you do Alex, I couldn’t ! And Paul, keep up your good work.

  2. Most societies recognize crimes against children, however lines are blurred when a crime is committed by a parent or a family member, instead of a stranger.

    International parental child abduction (“IPCA”), is the illegal removal of children from their home by a “taking” parent to a foreign country. The “taking” parent is either violating existing custodial order or custodial rights of the other parent (children are taken without the other parent’s consent), and wrongfully retained in a foreign country.
    https://fight-ipca.com/

  3. I as a paternal grandmother had my gardianship removed due to a section 7 report that accused me of commiting the most disgusting criminal abuse no investigation grandkids being reinstated with a mother who has historic abuse of them no proper person would use evidenceless hearsay in a report just a sick twisted evil inhuman
    No finding facts needed
    Our law is lawless

  4. The only effective means to combat and eliminate parental alienation is to address it by means of a multi-faceted approach that involves fundamental changes to the present system of divorce, and alienated parents and their allies would be well-advised to channel their energies in this direction. This article is a call to action, involving four essential steps to address the problem of parental alienation. All other efforts will produce only superficial or short-term results.
    https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/co-parenting-after-divorce/201711/parental-alienation-what-is-the-solution

  5. He says: ‘I was certainly in a very dark place at one point – at my lowest ebb. I almost felt like I couldn’t go on. It all felt so hopeless.

    With divorce, you immediately lose half the time you’d spend with the kids. That in itself is a mental health crisis. But, like everything, these feelings pass and you start to feel stronger with every day.

    ‘Men no longer feel comfortable talking about relationships, and for the men who bottle it, it can be disastrous – they end up throwing themselves off buildings.’

    It was only the support of his family and the thought of his children living without him that helped Laurence back to full health and a position which, today, sees him resume his role as loving father.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-5852603/Laurence-Fox-reveals-custody-battle-ex-wife-Billie-Piper-lost-everything.html

  6. So many people complain about being hard done by, by child social services, but who would want the job that they have?

  7. An adult child of divorce shares the emotional burden of their parents divorce. As a parent, this individual is determined to stay married. Disappointment in parents,and anger at parents, are part of the experience of divorce. Sometimes this lead to more dependence on self and protecting themselves from emotional hurt in intimate relationships.

    I was 11 and 12 when my parents divorced and separated. I engaged in minor acts of rebellion to “punish” both my mother and father in ways specifically intended to make each of them feel as bad as possible. (for example, for my mother I broke things I had made as a child which she treasured). I also pulled away from both of them and stopped talking to them about things that happened in my life. This probably is a natural part of being that age anyway, but it was certainly accelerated by the divorce.

    I am now in my 30s, and looking back I can see that this has impacted on different aspects of my personality which are still present now. Not all of it is negative – having a chip on my shoulder has I think helped me do well in school and later professionally, but my tendency to withdraw when I am uncomfortable and not let people in does not do me favors. I have kids now, and I am determined not to “let them down” as I was.

  8. his is co-parenting!!! Co-parenting can work!

    Father shared this post: “Both parents able to be there for them and then so sad for my other two sons who are not allowed a smooth ,easy, loving life.sigh….anyway here is some co-parenting done right on mothers day this year actually.”

    Mothers response: “This is my post with just a part of a conversation between my sons father and I. We have good communication as we try to still raise him together but separate of course. We both choose to be fair, I’ve always pushed that they have a relationship. I lost my father at a young age and gained an amazing step dad who has raised me as his own so I know how important dads are first hand and how loosing one affects you for life. I sure don’t want to be one of those golden uterus moms because I know I’m no vigin Mary it took two of us to make a child and now its up to two families to raise him. Just because we didn’t work out doesn’t mean our child should suffer from it and drama. I hope it continues to be this way because it just works well. And yes he pays child support of $50.00 a month, no medical or insurance but if he can help with sports or want school photos then he gives money for those but I don’t take him for more than that and don’t make it about money. My fiances ex and mother to my two step children, well she’s the complete opposite of me..hence why I’m now even more for fathers rights.”

  9. Emotional abuse during childhood has long-term ramifications. An adult child shares a glimpse into their emotional world. The child learns at an early age to put aside their own desires to please their parent. This is at the expense of their own emotional needs, feelings and wants. This emotional abuse may revealed in all future relationships.

  10. NAGOYA – The Nagoya High Court ordered a woman on Tuesday to return her son to his father in the United States, saying her failure to comply with an international convention on child abductions is illegal.

    The court ruled in favor of the father in a dispute between parents, who are both Japanese, over the custody of their U.S.-born son, who was brought to Japan by his mother without the father’s consent in 2016.

    Presiding Judge Hisashi Toda of the high court said that although the son “claims he wants to stay in Japan, he has been living in the country being largely dependent on his mother, who wields unjust psychological influence on him.”

    The mother had been ordered by the Tokyo Family Court to return the son to the United States based on the 1980 Hague Convention on the Civil Aspects of International Child Abduction.

    But she ignored the order, prompting the father to file a habeas corpus appeal with the high court’s Kanazawa branch.

    The high court branch rejected his claim last November, saying, “Custody transfer would go against the son’s will.”

    However, the Supreme Court in March overturned the ruling, saying it sees “clear illegality” in the mother’s failure to comply with the order, and sent the case back to the high court.

    The Hague treaty sets out rules and procedures for the prompt return to the country of habitual residence of children under 16 taken or retained by one parent as a result of failed marriages, if requested by the other parent. Japan joined the convention in 2014.
    https://www.japantimes.co.jp/news/2018/07/18/national/crime-legal/nagoya-high-court-orders-mom-return-son-dad-u-s-disputes-boys-claim-wants-stay-japan/?appsule=1&idfa=FE05E620-328B-41DB-B78E-74FB9140C4CA#.W1cCdNUzaM_

  11. If I was a social worker how would I safeguard your child from any harm

    I WOULDN’T I’M NOT TRAINED THAT WAY
    I’M A SOCIAL WORKER

    May sound far fetched but how close to the truth is the statement

    Pa is child abuse running rife
    Social services protocol work where the child is
    Where the child is is where the abuse is

    Am I right or is there probability that I am right

  12. These people are social workers they go in favour of LA they also use false allegations in reports do not trust check out carla thomson on hcpc register she works cafcass hull

  13. If social workers and CAFCASS base their decisions on evidence why are so many innocent parents denied access??????????

  14. Children NEED BOTH PARENTS EQUALLY 50/50= HAPPY AND HEALTHY CHILDREN who will grow up to be HAPPY AND HEALTHY ……………“ ADULTS “

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